Thursday, June 30, 2016

Athena

To all the ex's
all the shiney heads
all the finger nail wax
to every crushed coke can
to each marble in the purple wine slip
beneath my grandmother's counter top
beneath all of her and Joe's pills. 
beneath the pile of mail
beneath the places I remember cereal and crumble sweets. 
To the way of life I grew up in love. 
Land. I grew up in loveland, no shit and i've got plotted land 
:or is it potted land? potable water? definitely high ceilings.
clear windows, fresh white paint streamed by sunlight. 
In my mind I see myself in all the settings I arrive in. 
On stage, In a play, playing Stratego with Ryan late into Christmas morning.
It must be strange to be a boy and grow up beside a girl. 
To see her take such shape before your eyes. 
To watch her take reigns of her own secret knowledge. 

By now, I've spent 6 summers  here. 
Back porch candle light second story studio
The power lines sure have blended into the night sky nicely at half past midnight 
But does time really matter? 
Isn't it arbitrary? 
People are working in the night. 
Lots of people work at night. 
Night is just as good a time to work as day. 
In fact during the day time, it's just too darn HOT to do much work these days with summer approaching
Which brings me back to you. 
you ex lover, you past marble breakfast -brother thought, turned syrupy. 
you. heat. hard. hot. man. 
Ajax. firm. Adorable. Simple. Sweet. Kind to the animals. 
sexy. hilarious. I'd love to watch him just sit by the campfire and fall in love with his war bride. 

The love they shared was real. 
The kindness she had was honest. 
The child they had was a son. 

It always goes like that doesn't it.  
to the son. to the son. 
Well guess what, I want to objectify the men and I will. 
Because I can.  
I will set you down and slice your throat. 
I will crush your ego and pin apart your soul. 
I will destroy you. 
I have snakes inside my bosom.  
And I'm unwed. 

You can see me can't you?  
I'm right here.
Why, I'm watching you from this stage watch me and these players. 

This story is about how the great Goddess survives. 
How she inhabits herself fully 
And manifests her own reality.

_______ poem ends here _______

_______But I just kept writing about my experience in the play, "Ajax: in Iraq"____

So, yeah, I'm a little method.  Yeah, so I like to get myself preparred to take on the She herself.  Athena.  

I need to do nothing but coordinate with my scene partner the grunts.  And dance inside the gestation of my masterpeice.  

It's not enough to tell you about Ajax I need to tell you about What I'm doing to AJ as well.  I'm reminding you of them.  Because they remind you of ME.  Of what happens when you go against nature.  You See What happens when a man crosses that line?  

All it takes is a day, is the best line of the whole show.  The world can change in an instant.  The right thing could happen at any moment.  In fact it is happening.  I'm not making it happen, but I'm watching, predicting, meddling, playing with.  Walking among.  Jogging beside. You bow down when I walk past.  You all honor me greatly, and you do right to do so. I am lifted and pledged alliegence to the globe that founded me.  I am the waters and desert. I am the Mountains and great Valleys, the clear water beneath the Mayan lands. Not that the Mayans owned land.  They didnt have the ego of others who came later with markers and maps, flags and ownership...The idea of MINE. The idea....that can never exist.....for too long. 

I am going to break the silence.  I am going to talk to you again.  Through her, the actress. I am going to have an intervention. We will speak. It is hardly a moment in time when I am not with you.  Just at the root of your navel, the warmth in your womb. Can you feel it? You can can't you?! yes. 

I never thought it would get this far! I mean I DID, like I knew it would...but still today things can just be done.....in a board room.  Emphasis on BORED!!!!!!!

Come on give me the heros!!! give me the Mastery of weaponry!!!  You've gotten so tied up in your ego you've driven yourself so far from nature that there is absolutely no going back.  #brexit! Mayhem let loose. 
---Now, it depends who you believe.....do you believe that the world is round or flat? 
Do you believe you go in a straight line to history or a circle? or is it a spiral?  Similar to the spiral pattern of our solar system as it hurls itself through dark space? 

Dark space like the warmth I feel in my belly....er my...beneath my belly.  In my womb.  These are my letters to god, these are my letters to theGoddess.  

She tells me we are all in her womb and mine grows warmer.  Like a water bed, except comfortable.   

Point is, I have and will never be dominated.  I rule the sky and sea and universe and the womb. Inside each woman is a holy space in which I reside.  So if you start fucking that place up--- The woman will be discombobulated for lack of a better term and her internal shrine co-op'ed by the patriarchy. 

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